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10
Suggestions for Soccer Parents 1.
Let the
coaches coach: Leave the coaching to the coaches. This includes
motivating, psyching your child up, after game critiquing, setting goals,
requiring additional training, etc. You have entrusted the care of your
child to the coaches; they need to be free to do their job. "Too many
coaches spoil the player."
2. Be
your child's best fan: Support
your child unconditionally. Do not withdraw love
when your child performs poorly. Your child should never have to perform
to win your love. 3.
Support all
players on the team: Foster teamwork. Your child's teammates are not
the enemy. There will always be greater and lesser players than
your child. When a teammate plays better, your child has a wonderful
opportunity to learn.
4.
Do not bribe or offer
incentives: Your job is
not to motivate. Leave this to the coaching staff. Bribes will distract
your child from properly concentrating in practice and game situations. 5. Encourage your child to talk with the coaches: If your child is having difficulties in practice or games, or can't make a practice, etc., encourage her to speak directly to the coaches. This "responsibility taking" is a big part of being a member of any team. When your child handles the off field tasks (knowing the schedule, preparing equipment for practices and games), she is establishing ownership of all aspects of the game.
6.
Understand
and display appropriate game behavior: Be supportive, cheer, but be appropriate. Players need to focus only on the parts of the game that
they can control (fitness, positioning, decision making, skill,
aggressiveness, reacting to what the game is presenting). When a player
focuses on what she cannot control, (what others are shouting),
performance suffers. Do not tell a player what to do. Do not critique a
play or player during the game. Never yell at the referee. Ever. 7
Help your child keep priorities straight: Help your child maintain a focus on schoolwork, relationships and the
other things in life beside soccer. Also, if your child has made a
commitment to soccer, help her fulfill her obligation to the team. 8
Reality
test: If the team loses a match, but your child has played her best,
help her to see this as a "win" and that you are proud of her.
Remind her that she is to focus on "process" and not
"results". Her fun and satisfaction should be derived from
"striving to win".
9
Keep
soccer in its proper perspective: Soccer should not be larger than life for you. If your child's
performance produces strong emotions in you, suppress them. Your
relationship will continue with your children long after their competitive
soccer days are over. Keep your goals/needs separate from those of your
child. 10. Have fun: That is what the coaches will be trying to do! We will challenge your child to reach beyond her "comfort level" and improve as a player. We will do this in an environment that is fun, yet challenging. We look forward to this process. We hope you do too!
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